Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest

The results are out for what is usually the most entertaining award ceremony of the year, and this year is no exception. My favourite passage is probably this one from the romance category, though they are all tremendous examples of really, appallingly bad writing.

“Despite the vast differences in their ages, ethnicity, and religious upbringing, the sexual chemistry between Roberto and Heather was the most amazing he had ever experienced; and for the entirety of the Labour Day weekend they had sex like monkeys on espresso, not those monkeys in the zoo that fling their faeces at you, but more like the monkeys in the wild that have those giant red butts, and access to an espresso machine."

Dennis Barry, Dothan, Alabama

You can read a few more here.